If there's one thing that history has surely proven it’s that things never are the way you’d expect them to be. For instance, have you ever found that after waking up your day has suddenly turned into what could only be described as a well-plotted horror movie? These days are called Mondays and should be avoided at all costs. It was one of those moments, a moment I’ll refer to here as a Monday Moment, that occurred when I looked into the blue Tupperware container. There were supposed to be eggs in there. Perfectly, unpeppered, cooked eggs. What I found, was not at all what I was expecting.
“What is this?” I asked and like a Looney Toon Cartoon that looked down when he shouldn’t have, the air from under me gave way and Gravity, who was minding her own business, suddenly noticed that I was trying to usurp her. I came crashing down, Tupperware and all. Luckily, Chevron broke my fall.
Without asking how I was, the Ambassador took the Tupperware from off the earth and eyed the contents suspiciously.
“First,” he said. “These are still warm! Second, what’s this strange yellow thing?”
There are moments where confusion can breakaway to understanding—this was not one of them.
“It’s a baby chicken,” I said.
“How? There were no uncracked eggs in there. Just unpeppered eggs that had been cooked.”
“I know, sir.”
“Well, you see what the problem is,” he said. “Don’t you?”
I shook my head. I didn't know.
The ambassador put his hand on my shoulder.
“You kept them too warm," he said.